Heights of Desire by Mara White

Author:Mara White [White, Mara]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Published: 2013-12-22T05:00:00+00:00

Robert and I have mended what we can of our marriage. I’m guessing that he no longer trusts me like he once did, but maybe it’s better that way. Sometimes I get the impression that Robert has more respect for me since the affair. It’s almost as if it made me more autonomous and now it’s harder for Robert to take me for granted. He is genuinely trying to work less, to join in the family life more. We’ve both become much better at communicating. The sex is better too. It’s as if Robert’s desire for me were renewed via Jaylee’s. Robert likes to win and now he’s enjoying the spoils of the war.

Despite the improvements there are still sore spots. Certain things set Robert off. He hates it when Stephani babysits because he still thinks Jaylee is her cousin and I haven’t had the guts to tell him differently. He gets testy when I feel like being alone and God forbid a man, especially a Dominican, catcalls me on the street when Robert’s with me. Whereas before he wrote them off as losers, now he looks at them as a viable threat. I should tell him that I’m not necessarily attracted to Dominican men, or even younger men for that matter. It was the chemistry I had with Jaylee and nothing else that drew me into an affair. But that would be inviting a conversation I never want to have, so I just let him think what he wants. Chances are I’ll never again encounter another connection like the one I had with Jaylee, bringing the likelihood of infidelity on my behalf to a screeching halt. I often wonder about Robert though. I wonder if he feels like he has a free pass since I cheated, but then I remember how entitled he can act and I realize that he’s probably always felt like he has a free pass, solely by being who he is.

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